Monday, January 4, 2010
Writer's Block or Should I Say Unblock
Yes, it' me! Once again this Wal-mart manager survived the holiday season in usual fashion! I apologize for not being around, but since Thanksgiving all I've done is eat, sleep and work. Well on to more important things like writing!
I've made it no secret that for years I took a break from my craft. Years that I look back on now as wasted time. I'm sad for all of the projects that I could have completed and for all the characters I could have met along the way. Up until college, I spent many hours working on my writing and truly honing in my skills. I didn't care what people thought about me or what I wrote about! One professor...one professor is all it took and what I thought were my hopes and dreams came crashing down around me. It happened at such a vulnerable time in my life that I simply turned my back on everything I loved and walked away! I enrolled in management training with Wal-mart and off I went into a completely different career.
Looking back now I know this wasn't their fault. In fact every bit of it was mine. As a writer we should have thick skin for the criticism that we will ultimately endure. So much other stuff was going on in my life that I allowed one sneak comment to destroy the one thing that made me who I am. For five years I lived with the what ifs. Every time I attempted to even pen a sentence the only thing I saw was jade. So I didn't do!
This last May came with shocking news as I learned the foot surgery I had the previous year didn't hold and I would have to have another one. The second one was much more evasive and now I proudly carry a card that states I'm not a terrorist due to the amount of metal in my body! A close family member chatted with me on the phone after I learned the news and was feeling completely sorry for myself. Basically she asked me how long it had been since I'd written anything and than told me I was wasting my talent. Ultimately she wondered if this wasn't God's way of coercing me back into what I once loved so much.
The next day I sat at my computer attempting to lay something down; anything just to say I had. Two days later I finished a short screenplay. Shortly after that I created this blog.
I'd like to think my time at Wally World hasn't been a complete waste. I've learned a lot about human behavior and needs. I can see how much the maturity of my characters has changed over the years. One thing I do know is working with 500 people your life is an open book! You hear things about yourself all the time and it truly builds thick skin. So as I progress in the writing world this time I won't be so easily scared away.
Since that first day at the computer writing that short screenplay, its like a dam has broke inside my brain. I'm unable to stop the ideas from flowing so freely. All those years of keeping it so bottled up has caught up to me. Currently I have a list going of projects I want to tackle. At this rate I won't be caught up until sometime in 2012. I love this though...feeling as if I've finally comeback alive. My one wish in 2010 is to keep up with it all!